MSNBC.COM, Stop Treating Me Like A Child

Listen, msnbc.com.  I'm taking issue here with the new way you're displaying your "human interest"/celebrity gossip stories.

My husband was nice enough to recently let me choose what our shared-computer's browser's homepage was, and guess what!  I choose YOU, msnbc.com!  I know you're not a lot of people's first choices, but I like you. I like your layout, I like how you group things, I like your stories.  I like how you make it obvious whether the link I'm clicking on will take me to a video or a text page.  You've been good to me, msnbc.com.  You've always treated me like an adult, and I appreciate that.  While you may be a little more left-leaning than some other news outlets, I forgive your bias (because it's my bias, too).

So.  You've been our homepage for a couple weeks now.  And my dear husband hasn't insisted that we go back to the New York Times International Edition (we love him despite his pretension).  So, I'm thinkin' you're pretty much in like Flynn, here, msnbc.com.

But--I hate to say it--you might have fucked it all up.

This morning I woke up, fumbled around for my glasses, gave good-morning kisses to Big Ern and Tiny Twain, stumbled into the kitchen to see if dear husband was making me my damn coffee yet (luckily for him, he was), and then went to the computer, as is my custom. 

I fired up the firefox and there you were--greeting me with the headlines, gently welcoming me to May 24th, 2010.  What's this?  An update on the BP oil spill?  **Click**  Mmm, good article.  And how about this link over here?  Information on the ongoing struggle to fix Don't Ask Don't Tell?  **Click**

Mmmm, interesting, good reporting, msnbc.com, just what I like, just what I like.

 And look at this over here!  Britanny Murphy's widower has himself died?!  **Click**

Wait, wait, wait...have I been redirected to another website?  What is this font fit for a kindergartener?!  Is this the large-print version for the visually-impaired?  Why does this look all...fluffy and prissy?  Where's my sans-serif Arial font?  This can't possibly be my beloved msnbc.com, can it?  This is, like, fricking Garamond or something!

And why do I have a goddamn link to print this article?! What, for my fucking scrapbook?!

You've genuinely pissed me off, msnbc.com.  I am not a child, just because I occasionally want peek in on what's happenin' in Hollywood.  Are you trying to distance yourself from the story?  Make it look like it's not part of msnbc.com's normal format?  Are you trying to say, "Hey, we think this shit is super-childish!  We're not a part of that" and yet still BE a part of it by having the story written by your journalists and linked at the top of your homepage?

You should just own it, man.  You should just figure out that people who read your stories about BP and Afghanistan and tax credits fueling home sales also like to occasionally read about dead celebs or rehabbing celebs or divorcing celebs.  You shouldn't make us feel like infants for wanting to read those things by giving it to us in such a patronizing format.  I AM NOT A CHILD OR AN ELDERLY PERSON IN NEED OF DOUBLE SPACING AND FANCY FONT.

I really hate to say it, but I think I might change my homepage tonight, msnbc.com.  Maybe to The Economist's home page.  Or U.S. News & World Report.  Or maybe even back to the NYT-International home page.  (Don't make me do it, msnbc.com!  We can't let dear husband win!!!)

Jeez, Catholics, get it together, guys!

I'm sure you've all heard this story.  A nun was recently ex-communicated from the Catholic Church for allowing the abortion of a 27-year-old's fetus because her life was in danger. 

My husband's comment last night was "They ex-communicate a nun on the spot for this, yet they allow pedophile priests to remain in their positions for years."

I don't really think there's anything else to say on the matter.  Well said, dear.

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mom's Day!  In honor of this wonderful holiday, I am posting some pictures of my "kids"...

This is Ernie, my oldest...he's 3 and is a bit shy around company.  He's a soft-spoken meower, but has a deep, manly purr.  He has such a regal presence that his nickname is King Henry VIII.

This is Twain, our little dude who screeches like a pterodactyl.  He'll be two in June.  He meows at eh-HEV-rything, day or night.  There's no telling what goes on in that little empty head of his!  He's super-cuddly and just a wee bit overweight (by three pounds, actually).  He snores in his sleep...it's rather cute. 

And here they are together...two glorious tabby cats!  Were there ever such spoiled brats in the history of the world?!  I think not.  I am a very proud mom...

National Day of Prayer & Christmas

Okay, so whether we all agree with the following statement or not, it's been deemed so by U.S. District Court Judge Barbara Crabb :  The law that mandates a proclamation by the President of a National Day of Prayer is unconstitutional.  (See link to story here)

This is not to say that the President can't make a proclamation of his own volition, or that praying is now outlawed, or any of the other nonsense that religious Americans are claiming will be the result if Judge Crabb's ruling is upheld in higher courts.  Religious folks have a lot of latitude in the U.S. and do not face "persecution", as they claim, just because secular government remains secular.

Speaking of secular government (or, at least, non-sectarian government), what the fuck is up with Christmas being a national holiday? 

All of our other national holidays are secular/nationalistic in nature: Veteran's Day, Memorial Day, Labor Day, Presidents' Day, Independence Day, etc.  Thanksgiving, I suppose, could be considered a religious holiday--a day set aside for giving thanks to God--but it's non-sectarian.  It doesn't celebrate the birth of one particular religion's savior.  People of all religions can give thanks to their own particular god(s) and people who are non-religious can give thanks to the people in their lives. 

If Christmas were to no longer be a national holiday--because, let's face it, it seems pretty damn unconstitutional in light of the recent ruling on the National Day of Prayer--it would not mean that it would be illegal to celebrate Christmas.  It wouldn't mean that there couldn't be private businesses closed on Christmas.  It wouldn't mean anything except that our secular government's agencies would be open that day.  Because it's illegal to favor one religion over another--there can be no "establishment of religion".  Which, if you think about it, is basically what's happening when the government shuts down entirely for the express purpose of observing a Christian holiday.

You say it would suck if Christmas were not a national holiday and your place of employment didn't automatically close, do you?  You say that would be lame if you had to work on Christmas?  Well, I'm sure that Jews think it's lame to work on Yom Kippur.  I'm sure that Muslims would like the month of Ramadan off.  Pagans would want the equinoxes and solstices off.  I mean, this is America.  Everybody is equal.  We either all get our holy days off, or nobody gets their holy days off.  If Christmas should be allowed to be a national holiday, we should recognize every religious holiday held by any American so as to not appear to be endorsing one religion over another and to not hinder the free exercise of any religion.

Come to think of it, our weekends (days when governmental agencies of all levels are not open) are based on certain religions as well...Saturday and Sunday just happen to be the weekly days of worship for Christians and Jews.  But what if my holy weekday is Thursday because I worship Thor?  (I do not actually worship Thor.)  Shouldn't I get that day off, too?  Or how about those whose god is the moon?  Shouldn't they get Monday off? 

I really think the Freedom From Religion Foundation should take up the cause of abolishing December 25th as being a national holiday.  Or each religion should lobby congress to pass a bill respecting their particular religious holiday of choice.  Either way, equality for all.  It's an American value.

I got WEEEEEEDS, man!

Aaaaahhh!  I freaking love working in the garden!  Particularly PULLING UP WEEDS!  It's like picking out an ingrown hair, or popping a zit that's ready to go!  Deeply satisfying!  I spent like an hour and a half outside today with the weed roots in my garden and I even got a sunburn on my lower back between the spot where my shirt ended and my pants began!

Pulling out those weed roots was magical...made me feel happy and connected with nature.  If you're ever in a bad mood, just go pull some weeds somewhere!  I guarantee you'll feel better about life.